Whatever Happened?

Last night I got particularly drunk. I kissed a boy I'd never met before and I told people about being toxic and I danced and I got hit on and I was a mess. An utter, utter mess. 


Lucky number three wasn't lucky and the world is full of creeps and I hate how everyone assumes that you have had sex. I hate how everyone assumes you're ok with making out, just because everyone else seems to be and I hate, loathe, abhor the popular culture world. 


I can't hold my alcohol. 


Whatever happened to the chivalry we read about in books? Whatever happened to dinner and a movie before the first kiss? Whatever happened to that awkward, pure and honest like that came before love, that appeared as a feeling in your stomach when you were in the same room, or made your heart skip faster when he said hello?


I guess that when push comes to shove, it doesn't matter ever so much because I'll end up contaminating the pretty, pure thing anyway. Still, I miss the thought. 


So cyberworld, this is awkward me asking awkward you out on an awkward first date so maybe the next time I send out my love, it will seem a bit more pure. 


Stars (***)